Dear Friends, Romans, Countrymen, I beg your forgiveness but I did not catch this fish. True I was down at the landing fishing but had not gotten a bite...fart...nothin' when this guy drove up. He got out of his car and opened his trunk and said....."want a big catfish "?....I said....damn...that is a big catfish.....looks like Walter Jr. (Walter Senior is a big big catfish). So I halled butt home and put him in a big bucket of water still kicking....by that time Wandra came out with the camera.....she always comes out with the camera when I get in from fishing because she knows that Thomas Joseph is the world's #1 fisherman!! Well she is going bonkers about this catfish.....where did I catch it....couldn't believe that I caught it off the bank. She asked what I caught it on....I thought I would play at lil' bit....I told her a Top Water Bait (almost next to impossible to do)...she couldn't believe it....she was going on and on about how gooooooood it's going to taste when we get ready to eat it...lol
She goes back in the house and unknowing to me .....back on the computer (as usual) and e-mails everybody and their momma and tells them about the big flathead catfish I caught standing on the bank down at the landing. I'm fixing to start skinning and cleaning this big ole cat. Now I know I stretched the truth before bout me catchin' it but the rest of the story is the truth and nothing but the truth so help me Lord!! I reach down in the bucket and this ole cat has a big tear in his eye....I ain't lyin'.....I said....damn....I done lied bout this catfish and going straight to fishin'hell.....right then and there....it was bright light....in my baldhead....I'm going to let Walter Jr. go....I raced back down to the landing (bout 45 seconds) and lay lil Walter gently in the water. He just lay there....not moving....nothin'....I said poo poo ....lil' Walt gonna die...What the hell....I'll just get him and take him back home and clean him for supper. Just as reached down...that SUCKER took off like a bottle rocket...splashed water all over me....I had parked my jeep down toward the water since it done got dark....and I could see ole Walter Jr. stop dead in his tracks bout 15 yds out, he lifted his big ole head outta the water and had the biggest shiteatin' grin ya ever seen and made some kind of catfish grunt and went down never to be seen again...that is the gospel accordin' to Thomas Joseph!! p.s. I never told Wandra no different......til now...lol lol
Relaxing
No comments:
Post a Comment